Interesting, Women and Tango

               It is my belief that the women who get the most repeat dances are those who are interesting to their partners.

               You might ask, “How does a person become interesting?”

                You don’t.         

               Simply being a member of the human race makes you incredibly interesting. Unfortunately, all your life you’ve been taught to hide what makes you unique. You’ve been led to believe that you must project competence and sanity.

               There is no room for these lies within the tango embrace. No amount of preparation can equip you for what the leader is going to do next. This is an exercise in spontaneity.

               In the privacy of your own mind, you know full well that you have seriously questioned your own sanity, yet your experience has been that the crazy side of you is what people love most.

               The follower must enter the tango connection listening intently and completely exposed. In such a state, a woman’s emotions float on the surface like a scoop of ice cream in a tall glass of soda.

               Tango is a conversation conducted in a series of individual and distinctive steps. The dancers may appear fluid in their movements but each step is a negotiation. If I say something and the person to whom I am talking answers before I even have a chance to complete my sentence, I will lose interest in the discussion.

               The lady who worries about how she appears to others does not need to hear the end of the sentence; she will decide when it is time for her to move. She has no connection and the best part of her remains hidden from her partner.

               A woman who is concerned with where she is going will wait until she has gotten all the clues. She is so focused on reading her partner that she is completely unaware of what is happening to the rest of her: she flushes, sighs, gasps, becomes frustrated, angry, happy, all in the span of a song. She is like an open book, an incredibly interesting novel written by the universe. She is a movie and a play and an opera, all at once.

               A follower becomes interesting when she is a part of the conversation, listening to what her partner has to say and then responding in whatever manner she chooses.  She can make no mistakes for her imperfections are not distractions, they are assets; they are what makes her unique.

               This woman is a tanguera. She is a drug that men, once having tasted, cannot resist. Every woman can be her from Day One but few are. For some it is a journey of years, for others it is the impossible dream and for the rest, it is pure ecstasy.

              

For more of the Kayak Hombre, read my book Fear of Intimacy and the Tango Cure or River Tango. Available on Amazon.com in paperback or Kindle.